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All of the authors were members of the Harvard Negotiation Project. The book made appearances for years on the Business Week bestseller list.


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The book suggests a method called principled negotiation or " negotiation of merits". Members of the Harvard Negotiation Project , Fisher and Ury focused on the psychology of negotiation in their method, "principled negotiation", finding acceptable solutions by determining which needs are fixed and which are flexible for negotiators. The book became a perennial best-seller. By July , it had been appearing for more than three years on the Business Week "Best-Seller" book list.

The first principle of Getting to Yes —"Separate the people from the problem"—applies to the interaction between the two parties to a negotiation.

Negotiators are Born and Bred: Berneman’s 10 Rules for Principled Negotiation

The principle is broken down into three subcategories: perception, emotion, and communication. The authors point out that negotiators are people first—people who have values, cultural backgrounds, and emotions that vary by person. Negotiation can either build trust and understanding with a positive relationship established at the end, or lead to frustration or dissatisfaction. The authors discuss how the relationship between parties tends to become entangled with the problem that the parties are discussing.


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Incorrectly deducing the intentions of the other party based on one's own fear is a common mistake; the authors describe it as a bad habit that could cost "fresh ideas in the direction of agreement". Communication is the main aspect of negotiating, and the authors point out three common problems in communication:.

I win, you win : the essential guide to principled negotiation

Similarly, in the book, I Win You Win , Carl Lyons explored the principle of "separating the person from the problem" and discovered that interests are an extension of values. People's current interests are always attempting to satisfy something that they value. Understanding this principle is a key first step in understanding people's behavior in negotiations. The second principle—"Focus on interests, not positions"—is about the position that the parties hold and the interests that led them to that position.

The authors recommend that negotiators should focus on the interests behind the position that each party holds. Both parties should discuss their interests and keep an open mind to the other side of the argument. The third principle—"Invent options for mutual gain"—is about benefiting both parties that are doing business. This principle aims to help the parties find an option that will impact each party in a positive way, making both sides feel like they did not get taken advantage of during the negotiation. It is important to listen to the other party and not make a decision until both parties feel that they have been heard.

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Both parties should clearly explain their intentions and what they want out of the conversation. I Win, You Win is a thought-provoking, inspirational and eminently practical aid to getting what you want without compromising your professional integrity.

I Win, You Win : The essential guide to principled negotiation. Carl Lyons. Full of useful exercises, case studies and accessible advice, this book will help readers achieve their goals by showing them how to: prepare effectively build rapport communicate openly enhance trust in their business I Win, You Win is a thought-provoking, inspirational and eminently practical aid to getting what you want without compromising your professional integrity.

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Principled negotiation strategy for entrepreneurs

Preparing for Negotiation Understanding how to arrange the meeting space is a key aspect of preparing for negotiation. This discussion was held at the 3 day executive education workshop for senior executives at the Program on Negotiation at Harvard Law School. Remember Me This setting should only be used on your home or work computer.

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